thegrrrl2002: (Jack peering)
[personal profile] thegrrrl2002
This one is for [livejournal.com profile] skater_g8r. She requested SG-1, Jack/Jack. So I gave it a try. The ficlet is rough and unbeta'd, (sorry!) and a bit longer than I intended. It's hard to be concise with this kind of thing. It's a sequel of sorts to Reason #435 Why Offworld Sex Is Not a Good Idea.



When they're both naked Jack can't tell which one is his Daniel. He feels guilty about that, but not too much, because identical hungry mouths are sucking, licking and kissing, one at his stomach, the other behind him, spreading him open, exposing him, a wet tongue sliding between his cheeks. Jack moans and his fingers claw at the spread out sleeping bag, bunching it up under his head.

It's hot in the temple, the air heavy with unshed rain. There are arms and legs everywhere, twining and tangling. There's skin, lots of bare, naked skin rubbing together shiny with sweat. Jack is exhausted, his body heavy and lazy. He them have their way, lets Daniel lift his leg and nuzzle his balls, while another arm hooks over his hip, skin slick and wet. Jack knows that what they are doing is insane, absolutely insane. Still, his life has been pretty damn whacked out for years now, and at least this is good and whacked out. Two mouths on him, and it's so good, two mouths eating him alive, Daniel's tongue pushing inside of him, Daniel's mouth is on his cock and Jack is getting hard again.

"Oh yeah," Jack says; only he's not the one who said it.

The other bastard is stealing his lines. Jack glares at the man sucking Daniel's cock and wonders if he should be jealous. Daniel is clearly enjoying it, gasping and moaning around Jack's cock as he sucks. But then he rolls onto his back, leaving Jack's cock behind, spreading his legs wide.

"Hey," Jack complains. He turns to watch the gray head bob up and down, Daniel's thick cock sliding between his lips as it disappears into his mouth. The movement is slow and deliberate, and just as slowly Daniel's back arches, a desperate sound of pleasure escaping his throat. Daniel's hand finds Jack's cock and squeezes, and that suits Jack just fine because the other Daniel is still behind him doing all kinds of wonderful and nasty things with his mouth.

Daniel squeezes again. Jack's cock is hard and ready for more action. Not bad for an old guy. He wants to point this out to the other Jack, point out that he's fully recovered, because he's better than him, but oh god--fingers, slick with who-knows-what are inside of him, and he can only make vague, unintelligible sounds. Daniel chuckles and bites his ass, teeth sinking into skin. Jack yelps at the sharp, welcome pain and thinks that maybe this one is his, after all.

The wind gusts through the window, cooler this time. Daniel kisses Jack's ass and then sits up, sniffing the air. "Rain?"

"Huh?" Jack asks. He welcomes the coolness, but he can't think right now, never mind comment on the weather.

The other Daniel merely moans. The rain finally begins, a summer downpour. Another gust brings it into the room with them, cold heavy drops splattering Jack's overheated skin. The sleeping bags are going to get wet, but he doesn't care because now Daniel is licking drops of water from Daniel's body. Jack can't take his eyes off of them, it's such a pretty picture, one Daniel sprawled flat on his back, arms outstretched, eyes closed, the other leaning over him, pink tongue gliding along his chest, lapping at the wet skin. His are fingers still inside of Jack, and Jack likes the connection, likes the pleasure the movement brings. He reaches for Daniel, cupping his head, running his fingers through the short, damp hair. Daniel is getting noisier, and Jack loves the expression of pure, mindless pleasure on his face.

He loves Daniel.

Both Daniels.

He loves all the Daniels that ever were.

Daniel's cries grow higher in pitch. His hand clenches and unclenches around Jack's cock. He comes, mouth open, silent at first, then moaning in a way that is so familiar to Jack that he's suddenly convinced that *this one* is his.

He's still pondering this as he lets the other Daniel roll him over onto his stomach. Instinctively he rises up on his knees, his cock heavy between his legs, his ears still full of the sound of Daniel coming, the sound that wraps itself around his heart and settles near the base of his spine. The rain gusts in again and he's hot and cold all at once and needs a Daniel pushing inside of him right now.

But the arm that slides around his belly isn't Daniel's.

"Fuck," Jack says.

"Oh, absolutely," Jack replies.

"You've *got* to be kidding." This isn't what Jack wants, but something thick and hard bumps up against his ass and that *is* what he wants.

"I kid you not," Jack tells him, steadying him with one rough hand on his hip.

It's worse than talking to himself. Usually, he doesn't answer himself back. "Fuck," he says again.

The other Jack does just that, pushing his cock into Jack's ass. "You mean like this?"

"You're a sick, sick man." Jack bites back a moan as he is penetrated, stretched wide open--pressure, a little pain, a lot of pleasure, all of it mixing together. "Pervert," he spits out.

"You would know." Jack strokes his hip and slides his dick all the way inside of him, until his thighs are pressing up against the back of Jack's thighs.

"You got two really nice asses to chose from," Jack says, waving a hand at the two naked men lounging just out of reach. "So why the hell--"

"Because I could, that's why."

"Gives a whole new meaning to the term 'go fuck yourself', doesn't it?" asks the owner of one of those really nice asses. He's resting his head on Daniel's chest, eyes half-open as he yawns. Daniel's arm drapes across his stomach as if it's his own. They are watching with such rapt expressions that Jack is tempted to ask if they want popcorn. But then Jack thrusts into him, with a little twist of the hips and he can't even talk, it feels good, annoyingly good, good in a way that really pisses him off. He tightens his muscles and squeezes.

"Because I thought of it first," Jack was saying, "and thinking is probably not--oh, oh fuckfuckfuck."

Jack clenches his muscles even tighter, and Jack shudders, moaning now, not talking anymore. Jack feels his cock pushing deep into his body, hitting that spot, right *there*. He grunts, Jack gasps, hands clutching at his hips.

Both Daniel's eyes open wide and they lean forward in a this-is-getting-really-good-now kind of way. Jack shakes his head--fucked up, whacked out, definitely one hundred percent insane. He's on his hands and knees, being fucked by himself, his own hard, hairy self and even though it's wrong, really wrong, it feels damn good.

It gets even more insane when Jack leans over and pants, "Yeah, I know just what you like, you dog you." His breath is hot in Jack's ear, and that might even have been a kiss on the side of his neck. Or a drop of rain.

"Don't be so sure," Jack growls.

But then he feels a sting of pain as Jack's hand slaps his ass, hard.

Page 1 of 2 << [1] [2] >>

Date: 2004-08-03 10:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mz-bstone.livejournal.com
Marry me.

Seriously.

I will woo you with notebooks.

B

Date: 2004-08-03 11:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] frahulettaes.livejournal.com
get in line.
Behind ME.
I just have no words...
dude.

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com - Date: 2004-08-03 11:27 am (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com - Date: 2004-08-03 11:25 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2004-08-03 10:49 am (UTC)
ext_1758: (handsome)
From: [identity profile] raqs.livejournal.com
yup, that's dirty. ;-)

stop luring me into reading porn at work. i have work to do.

Date: 2004-08-03 11:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
It was...complicated. I gave up on fiddling around to make it sound pretty and just had fun with it.

And what is there to do at work other than read porn? Oh, yeah, writing it.

Date: 2004-08-03 10:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] brightbeak.livejournal.com
*pulls fingers off keyboard b/f she gets 3rd degree burns*!
wow!

bb

Date: 2004-08-03 11:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
Thank you! I dunno, I think it's messy, but hey, it was fun.

Date: 2004-08-03 11:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nostalgia-lj.livejournal.com
You are evil in all the good ways.

Date: 2004-08-03 11:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
Hah! And you would know something about evil now, wouldn't you?

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] nostalgia-lj.livejournal.com - Date: 2004-08-03 02:57 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2004-08-03 11:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gypsy86.livejournal.com
I thought the pronouns of regular slash were hard to keep in order.

This takes the cake.

Also? It's rather nasty. And extremely surreal. In that incredibly good way.

It's a good thing I finished my homework before I read this.
wanders off with the image of two identical nekkid Daniels in her head...

Pronoun and noun Hell

Date: 2004-08-03 11:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
Can you tell I sort of gave up at the end? Jack, Jack Jack. It was all about Jack. I figured wouldn't really matter all that much if it wasn't clear which Jack I was referring to. (The one having sex! Yes!) It would all add to the surrealness of it. (Is that a word?)

It was fun to imagine, but exhausting to write. *g*

Date: 2004-08-03 11:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] carolyn-claire.livejournal.com
Buh gerf da fmph erm ahhhh....

*thunk*

That one goes to 11. It's transcendant. I be changed forever. In the good way--good for a perv, I mean. Very, very good.

*is lightheaded*

Date: 2004-08-04 05:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
Hee! Thank you. You're sweet. ::blushes::

Writing this made my brain hurt, believe me.

Date: 2004-08-03 11:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kelly-girl.livejournal.com
Oh wow. I'd say, "I'll be in my bunk," but I don't know if I could make it. Just wow, love the images and it's so dirty and twisty and hot and right and kinda wrong and two, two slutty daniels and two, two slutty Jacks.

Love the image of the Daniel's watching and the Jack's subtle competition then the last line was justtttttt right.

I say we all get married and start a commune.

Date: 2004-08-04 05:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
The SlashWriters Commune! That sounds like a lot of fun. *g*

Glad all that sluttiness worked for you. Thank you!

Date: 2004-08-03 11:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] corilannam.livejournal.com
It gets even more insane when Jack leans over and pants, "Yeah, I know just what you like, you dog you." His breath is hot in Jack's ear, and that might even have been a kiss on the side of his neck. Or a drop of rain.

Guhhh.

*tries to get some moisture back in mouth*

Yeah, that's fucked up. Totally fucked up. I absolutely love it.

Date: 2004-08-04 05:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
Thank you! ::is proud of fucked-up-ed-ness::

Date: 2004-08-03 11:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] skater-g8r.livejournal.com
OMG! you did it!
i wasn't sure if you would! i'm sorry! was naughty of me to ask ::cheeky grin::

well..that definatley worked ::blush::
Oh! dear! i can't get that image out my head now!...so naughty *g* but so good 8-D

can't wait for nicci's request *eeg*

This is so much fun 8-DDD
Thank you <3

Date: 2004-08-04 06:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
Hey, it never hurts to ask! *g* You gave me the nudge I needed to give it a try. It was tough in some places, but worth the effort, I think. And certainly fun to think about. I'm glad you enjoyed it!

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] skater-g8r.livejournal.com - Date: 2004-08-04 07:46 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2004-08-03 01:13 pm (UTC)
ext_8600: (water kiss)
From: [identity profile] reedfem.livejournal.com
Oh.My.God.

I have died and gone to Grrrl-y heaven.

Hmmmm...Kylie's away, I oughta run and snatch you up
wisk you away to an opulent room full of chocolate truffles, Stargate DVDs and the latest computer technology so you can write more more more!

You've melted my brain.

Date: 2004-08-04 06:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
I'm all yours, sweetie! Lets go play on the trampoline. *g*

Date: 2004-08-03 01:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] destina.livejournal.com
Um.

I'm really sorry for the mess, but it appears my head has exploded. I...this is so nasty. Filthy dirty, actually, and I love you. Hello, will you marry me? Forget about Brighid and her notebooks, I have chocolate and porn. *g*

Date: 2004-08-04 06:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
Ewww, brains everywhere. What a mess.

I'm glad you liked the nasty. I was indulging my inner nastiness. While stumbling over endless pronouns.

BTW, I'm actually a jellybean kind of girl. Chocolate is okay, but feed me Jelly Bellys and I'm yours forever.

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] destina.livejournal.com - Date: 2004-08-04 11:28 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2004-08-03 02:03 pm (UTC)
epeeblade: (Default)
From: [personal profile] epeeblade
Yay! Orgy of a lifetime indeed!!!!

Thanks for the peep show ;)

Date: 2004-08-04 06:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
You're very welcome! Glad you liked it.

Date: 2004-08-03 02:28 pm (UTC)
ext_16871: (Default)
From: [identity profile] nicci-mac.livejournal.com
Holy Hannah! That was... well, it was quite possibly the best OT4 I've ever seen. Trully amazing. Love how your mind works.

Date: 2004-08-04 06:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
OT4, LOL, I love it.

Thank you, Nicci!

Date: 2004-08-03 02:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sffan.livejournal.com
I'm guessing you got a lot of marriage proposals out of this one, so how about we just have a hot, dirty affair?

Oh dear lord the images in my head right now. *guh*

Date: 2004-08-04 06:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
Okay, I'll be right over, baby!

Glad I could add to the already large supply of naughty pictures in your head. *g*

Date: 2004-08-03 02:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] saladscream.livejournal.com
THUD
Wow...
Sorry, can't find words to tell how good this is. You just shot a few hundreds of my brain cells with this fic of yours. Terrific.

Date: 2004-08-04 06:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
Thank you so much! I felt like it came out kind of awkward in places, but still, it was pretty fun to think up. I really appreciate your kind words!

Date: 2004-08-03 04:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jenlev.livejournal.com
oh, i do love your sense of humor!

Date: 2004-08-04 06:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it!

Date: 2004-08-03 04:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] troyswann.livejournal.com
*blink*

Is that a two-some or a four-some?

And go you for the command of, not only leg-whereabouts, but pronouns. I doff my cap for you *bowing and scraping*

2Jack! 2Daniel! E-GAD!!! and guh! FINALLY the perfect post for my icon!

*brain explodes*

*confetti puffs out*

whoo-momma.

Date: 2004-08-04 06:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
I think it was a 2by2some. And it was a pronoun salad, really. A tossed pronoun salad, the kind where bits of lettuce end up everwhere. (Damn bowl is never big enough).

I'm honored by your comments. And your icon.

Date: 2004-08-03 08:31 pm (UTC)
ext_1844: (WTF)
From: [identity profile] lapislaz.livejournal.com
Day-umm. Do you do road shows?

Please ma'am, may we have some more?

Date: 2004-08-04 06:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
LOL! If I ever recover from this one. But it's very sweet of you to ask. *g*

I have two words for you. "Tre," and "mendous".

Date: 2004-08-03 08:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eregyrn.livejournal.com
THAT...was exactly what I was talkin' about. And then some. And then some more.

It would be difficult to think how it could be any more precisely exactly what I wanted to see
after "Reason #485". Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

It's all just delicious. But this:

"I kid you not," Jack tells him, steadying him with one rough hand on his hip.

This is where I just lost it. :D I don't know why. But it's *SO* Jack.

I absolutely loved that you didn't try harder than necessary to make it clear which "Jack" or "Daniel" or "him" or "his" went with whom, because I honestly do think it was tons more fun that way. Way more surreal and immediate than if you'd mucked around with too many "the other Jack"'s or whatever.

(And I'm glad I listened to my instinct not to read it at work, and saved it for bedtime reading instead. It's not that work isn't for reading porn. It's that really dirty, nasty, messy, INCANDESCENTLY HOT porn is best savored and appreciated without the mundane distractions of the workday around it.)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
I must say your enthusiasm encouraged me to take a stab at this! The pronouns were definitely challenging, but I figured I didn't want it to sound like an instruction manual. So I backed off on the detail. I'm glad it was effective. Thank you so much!

And I'll say it again--I just *love* that icon.

Date: 2004-08-03 08:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] slb44.livejournal.com
Oh God! That's was so hot it was incandescent. ;-)

Date: 2004-08-04 06:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
Thank you, you flatterer, you! *g* I'm glad you enjoyed it.

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] slb44.livejournal.com - Date: 2004-08-04 09:24 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2004-08-04 01:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] msbeata.livejournal.com
Oh, Oh no! You didn't stop there. Tell me you didn't stop there. Please!

It's so good, there must be more.

MMMMOOOORRRREEEE

Date: 2004-08-04 06:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
Awww, you're sweet. Thank you. But I'm still recovering from trying to write this one! (he who? Did what to him? Or the other him? Ahhhhh!)

I'm so tickled that you liked this!

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] green-fae.livejournal.com - Date: 2004-08-04 12:43 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com - Date: 2004-08-04 01:02 pm (UTC) - Expand

He'd probably be taking notes...

From: [identity profile] green-fae.livejournal.com - Date: 2004-08-04 04:08 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2004-08-04 08:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/oceana_/
I love you.
Seriously.
If I could, I'd cover you in naked Jacks and Daniels.

Date: 2004-08-04 04:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
::loves you back::

If I could, I'd cover you in naked Jacks and Daniels.

If you could, I would want you to. I'd share, you know.
Lurrrrve the icon, BTW. I wouldn't mind if you tossed an extra flyboy into the mix. *g*

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/oceana_/ - Date: 2004-08-06 10:00 am (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com - Date: 2004-08-09 07:03 am (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/oceana_/ - Date: 2004-08-11 03:58 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2004-08-04 10:00 am (UTC)
ext_8753: (Default)
From: [identity profile] vickita.livejournal.com
Oh my GOD.

Was it good for you, too?

*whew*

Damn.

Date: 2004-08-04 04:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
Oh yeah. Very good. I think. ::brain still hurting from pronoun/noun hell::

Glad you liked it, thank you so much!

Date: 2004-08-04 08:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lornelover.livejournal.com
[livejournal.com profile] burnt_smore is evil, for she sent me here, and now I will never leave.

*joins your harem*

Just... guh.

Takes this icon *points* to a WHOLE new level. And I think I like it.

Date: 2004-08-05 09:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
Thank you!!! I loooove the icon. And yes, I've always suspected that Ms. Smore was evil. In a sweet, gooey kind of way.

Glad you enjoyed the ficlet. It made my brain hurt a bit, but yeah, it had its fun moments.

sizzlePOOF

Date: 2004-08-04 10:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] carron.livejournal.com
adh aadu aw39uiej adshf aadfakjnajhd

*ahem*

a;dkj-=1 akdan adipaod nadihq2hnad

*cough cough*

adkj-392-i asodkfandh0a9udfn apdsip[shd

scew it - brain's fried - I thank you.

Carron

Re: sizzlePOOF

Date: 2004-08-05 09:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com
I think that's the silliest feedback I've ever received, and I love it! *g* Thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed the pervy fic. I figure you can never have too many Jacks.
Page 1 of 2 << [1] [2] >>

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