Ficlet O-rama
Aug. 11th, 2004 12:03 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Three more ficlets! Whew, this is a lot of work, but fun. Even the quickies take longer than I think they would. This time, they're all Jack/Daniel. I really had some interesting lines to work with this time.
First up is
erika_sanely's ficlet, who requested the great line ""You're saying flushing the phone down the toilet is not General-like?"
There Are No Innocent Bystanders
"So you're saying flushing the phone down the toilet is not General-like?"
"Uh, no sir, I wouldn't--you didn't really--?" Sam looked to Daniel for help, but Daniel merely shrugged. He was so not getting involved. He knew better.
"But Carter, it was Kinsey," Jack explained, spreading his hands on the briefing room table. "Teal'c? Back me up here."
Teal'c nodded. "I believe it was most appropriate, O'Neill."
"See?"
Daniel cleared his throat. "Do you think that maybe we could, uh, start the briefing?" He had slides, all set up on his computer and projected onto the screen, but no one was looking at them. "Maybe talk a little bit about what we might find on P2X-899?" he asked, pointing to the screen.
Sam looked at the screen, then back at Jack. "So is the bathroom clogged? This could really mess up the pipes. Does Sergeant Siler know about this?"
"It's being taken care of Colonel," Jack assured her. "Daniel? Is there a planet someplace that you want to go to?"
"Yes, Jack, it's really fascinating. Here--"
"Did you disconnect the hand piece, and only flush that?" Sam asked, with an I-really-need-to-figure-this-out furrow in her brow. "Because that's the only piece that would fit. Unless you have the entire unit wedged in there. Did you really unplug the whole phone and carry it into the men's room?"
"Carter--"
"I'm sorry sir, I can't help but wonder--"
"Carter--I was kidding. You got that? Kidding."
"Oh. I knew that, sir," Sam said quickly, and unconvincingly. She glanced at Daniel, and he saw the flush in her cheeks. "Okay." She nodded, eyes narrowing. "*Daniel*. About P2X-899--?"
Her voice was smooth and professional; the question, casual. But the twitch of her eyebrow spoke of revenge.
That naughty
nicci_mac requested Jack/Daniel/large latex vibrating dildo, and the line "Not even in your wildest dreams, Jack."
A Love So Pure
"Daniel?"
Daniel doesn't move. He lies motionless; arms flung wide and eyes closed, breathing through his open mouth. There is a generous amount of come smeared on his stomach and his cock is wet and shiny.
"Oh, Daniel," Jack says again, in a sing-song voice. He peels the condom from the dildo, which is still warm from Daniel's body, and climbs off the bed in search of a trashcan.
"Unnng," Daniel grunts. "Can't talk."
Jack finds the trash can and disposes of the condom. Now he needs a towel, since Daniel doesn't seem to be interested in cleaning himself off. He just lies there, dripping, as Jack searches in the disarray.
Daniel licks his lips and opens one eye. "I think I'm in love," he says, despite the fact he can't talk.
"Oh, you think?" Of course Daniel loves him, but he likes to hear it, especially in that low, breathless voice.
"Yes, yes I do." Daniel's outstretched hand finds the discarded toy, and he clutches it to his chest, patting it. "I've found my true love."
Smart ass. Jack seizes a towel hanging off the closet door. "Sure. Fine. See if it makes you coffee in the morning." He attempts to wipe down Daniel's belly with it, because no way was *he* going to get stuck sleeping in the wet spot.
Daniel pushes him away. "No, hey--I'm cuddling here." He rolls onto his side, curling his body around the dildo. "Give us a minute. And you know, it doesn't have to make me coffee. It can do other things."
"And I can't?" Jack inquires, smacking Daniel's ass with the towel.
Daniel runs his hand lovingly down the length of the shaft, then eyes Jack's sleepy, spent dick. "Not in your wildest dreams, Jack. It *vibrates*." He sighs contently, and closes his eyes. "Can you hit the lights on your way out? We wish to nap now."
Jack folds his arms against his chest, contemplating Daniel, curled up so neatly on the bed. Smooth, naked skin, with a hint of hard muscle in the shape of his arms, the slope of his thighs. His eyes remain closed, dark lashes brushing his cheek. But there's a gentle curve to his lips, and that makes Jack smile, because Daniel just can't do deadpan, not without that mouth giving him away.
He pounces, landing on Daniel with a thud, but there are no complaints. The toy falls to the floor, forgotten as Jack rolls Daniel over, pins his hands above his head and kisses him through the laughter.
And for the lovely
ningyouhime, who requested J/D with the line "Taquitos for breakfast?", I offer up:
Daniel?"
"What?" Jack is talking to me. Again. I turn to watch the coffee pot drip, ignoring him, hoping he'll take the hint.
He doesn't. "Surly, aren't we?" He squeezes my ass on his way to the fridge, as if it's there just for him to play with.
"Jack, it's morning." Which should explain everything, but Jack doesn't get it.
"It most certainly is." He pulls up the shade, letting in an unconscionable amount of sunlight. "A beautiful one. See? Blue skies and sunny. What do you have planned? I have to hit the hardware store, but maybe we can go for a ride, too. Just get out, do some stuff, enjoy our day off. What do you think? Hey you want to get dressed and go out for breakfast? Waffles? Pancakes?"
He's an insane man. If I had known he had a habit of springing out of bed wound up like a child's toy I would have reconsidered the whole "falling in love" business. But I didn't know. He's not like this on missions--he's all business when he wakes up, too focused for inane chatter. But here at home--
"Or maybe not. There's plenty of food here. Huh. What's--ah hah. Here we go."
He can't even poke through the refrigerator quietly. I can't figure out if he's talking to me, or is just enjoying the sound of his own voice.
"Daniel-yo--coffee's done," he points out helpfully, waving a hand in front of my face. I open my mouth, but nothing comes out--all my snotty comments got jammed up on the way from my brain to my mouth.
"Here, sit," Jack says, leading me to chair and sitting me down in it. "You're in my way." He's shaking his head, with that amused, you-are-being-so-Daniel-and-isn't-that-sweet expression. I begin to wonder what I ever saw in him when suddenly there's a steaming mug of coffee in front of me. As I start to drink it, the microwave beeps. Loudly and repeatedly. You'd think one beep would be enough, but no, the damn thing is programmed to beep incessantly, for no reason at all, because really, would be a grand catastrophe if you didn't make it there in time to burn your fingers on the food?
"Ah! Breakfast is served."
Jack returns and sets the plate on the table, with a cup of coffee of his own.
I stare in dismay at the pile of food. Another sip, and I find my voice. "Jack? Leftover taquitos for breakfast?"
"Mmmm. Good stuff. Here, try it." He holds the rolled up, deep-fried, and reheated stuffed tortilla to my lips. "Mmmm, day-old grease and meat and cheese, come on, you want it."
He's leaning toward me, eyes are bright, and if I didn't think it was such a god-awful cliché I'd say they were actually twinkling. His hair is a mess, he's bristly and unshaven, his tee-shirt is on inside out, and he's waving sodden leftover Mexican food under my nose.
"Jack, please," I say, putting down my cup. "I don't--I just don't--" but despite my best efforts, I can't help it, I'm losing the battle. I can feel the smile pulling at my lips, and Jack knows it, the bastard.
He smiles right back at me, happy as can be, and wags the food under my nose again. "You know you want it," he coaxes.
"That's not what I want," I finally tell him. I pluck the taquito from his fingers, toss it back to the plate and grab a handful of his tee-shirt, pulling hard.
The chair creaks alarmingly as he slides onto my lap. He's heavy and solid and his damn bony ass digs into my thighs, but I don't care, because he smells like bed and tastes like a brand new day.
First up is
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There Are No Innocent Bystanders
"So you're saying flushing the phone down the toilet is not General-like?"
"Uh, no sir, I wouldn't--you didn't really--?" Sam looked to Daniel for help, but Daniel merely shrugged. He was so not getting involved. He knew better.
"But Carter, it was Kinsey," Jack explained, spreading his hands on the briefing room table. "Teal'c? Back me up here."
Teal'c nodded. "I believe it was most appropriate, O'Neill."
"See?"
Daniel cleared his throat. "Do you think that maybe we could, uh, start the briefing?" He had slides, all set up on his computer and projected onto the screen, but no one was looking at them. "Maybe talk a little bit about what we might find on P2X-899?" he asked, pointing to the screen.
Sam looked at the screen, then back at Jack. "So is the bathroom clogged? This could really mess up the pipes. Does Sergeant Siler know about this?"
"It's being taken care of Colonel," Jack assured her. "Daniel? Is there a planet someplace that you want to go to?"
"Yes, Jack, it's really fascinating. Here--"
"Did you disconnect the hand piece, and only flush that?" Sam asked, with an I-really-need-to-figure-this-out furrow in her brow. "Because that's the only piece that would fit. Unless you have the entire unit wedged in there. Did you really unplug the whole phone and carry it into the men's room?"
"Carter--"
"I'm sorry sir, I can't help but wonder--"
"Carter--I was kidding. You got that? Kidding."
"Oh. I knew that, sir," Sam said quickly, and unconvincingly. She glanced at Daniel, and he saw the flush in her cheeks. "Okay." She nodded, eyes narrowing. "*Daniel*. About P2X-899--?"
Her voice was smooth and professional; the question, casual. But the twitch of her eyebrow spoke of revenge.
That naughty
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
A Love So Pure
"Daniel?"
Daniel doesn't move. He lies motionless; arms flung wide and eyes closed, breathing through his open mouth. There is a generous amount of come smeared on his stomach and his cock is wet and shiny.
"Oh, Daniel," Jack says again, in a sing-song voice. He peels the condom from the dildo, which is still warm from Daniel's body, and climbs off the bed in search of a trashcan.
"Unnng," Daniel grunts. "Can't talk."
Jack finds the trash can and disposes of the condom. Now he needs a towel, since Daniel doesn't seem to be interested in cleaning himself off. He just lies there, dripping, as Jack searches in the disarray.
Daniel licks his lips and opens one eye. "I think I'm in love," he says, despite the fact he can't talk.
"Oh, you think?" Of course Daniel loves him, but he likes to hear it, especially in that low, breathless voice.
"Yes, yes I do." Daniel's outstretched hand finds the discarded toy, and he clutches it to his chest, patting it. "I've found my true love."
Smart ass. Jack seizes a towel hanging off the closet door. "Sure. Fine. See if it makes you coffee in the morning." He attempts to wipe down Daniel's belly with it, because no way was *he* going to get stuck sleeping in the wet spot.
Daniel pushes him away. "No, hey--I'm cuddling here." He rolls onto his side, curling his body around the dildo. "Give us a minute. And you know, it doesn't have to make me coffee. It can do other things."
"And I can't?" Jack inquires, smacking Daniel's ass with the towel.
Daniel runs his hand lovingly down the length of the shaft, then eyes Jack's sleepy, spent dick. "Not in your wildest dreams, Jack. It *vibrates*." He sighs contently, and closes his eyes. "Can you hit the lights on your way out? We wish to nap now."
Jack folds his arms against his chest, contemplating Daniel, curled up so neatly on the bed. Smooth, naked skin, with a hint of hard muscle in the shape of his arms, the slope of his thighs. His eyes remain closed, dark lashes brushing his cheek. But there's a gentle curve to his lips, and that makes Jack smile, because Daniel just can't do deadpan, not without that mouth giving him away.
He pounces, landing on Daniel with a thud, but there are no complaints. The toy falls to the floor, forgotten as Jack rolls Daniel over, pins his hands above his head and kisses him through the laughter.
And for the lovely
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
Daniel?"
"What?" Jack is talking to me. Again. I turn to watch the coffee pot drip, ignoring him, hoping he'll take the hint.
He doesn't. "Surly, aren't we?" He squeezes my ass on his way to the fridge, as if it's there just for him to play with.
"Jack, it's morning." Which should explain everything, but Jack doesn't get it.
"It most certainly is." He pulls up the shade, letting in an unconscionable amount of sunlight. "A beautiful one. See? Blue skies and sunny. What do you have planned? I have to hit the hardware store, but maybe we can go for a ride, too. Just get out, do some stuff, enjoy our day off. What do you think? Hey you want to get dressed and go out for breakfast? Waffles? Pancakes?"
He's an insane man. If I had known he had a habit of springing out of bed wound up like a child's toy I would have reconsidered the whole "falling in love" business. But I didn't know. He's not like this on missions--he's all business when he wakes up, too focused for inane chatter. But here at home--
"Or maybe not. There's plenty of food here. Huh. What's--ah hah. Here we go."
He can't even poke through the refrigerator quietly. I can't figure out if he's talking to me, or is just enjoying the sound of his own voice.
"Daniel-yo--coffee's done," he points out helpfully, waving a hand in front of my face. I open my mouth, but nothing comes out--all my snotty comments got jammed up on the way from my brain to my mouth.
"Here, sit," Jack says, leading me to chair and sitting me down in it. "You're in my way." He's shaking his head, with that amused, you-are-being-so-Daniel-and-isn't-that-sweet expression. I begin to wonder what I ever saw in him when suddenly there's a steaming mug of coffee in front of me. As I start to drink it, the microwave beeps. Loudly and repeatedly. You'd think one beep would be enough, but no, the damn thing is programmed to beep incessantly, for no reason at all, because really, would be a grand catastrophe if you didn't make it there in time to burn your fingers on the food?
"Ah! Breakfast is served."
Jack returns and sets the plate on the table, with a cup of coffee of his own.
I stare in dismay at the pile of food. Another sip, and I find my voice. "Jack? Leftover taquitos for breakfast?"
"Mmmm. Good stuff. Here, try it." He holds the rolled up, deep-fried, and reheated stuffed tortilla to my lips. "Mmmm, day-old grease and meat and cheese, come on, you want it."
He's leaning toward me, eyes are bright, and if I didn't think it was such a god-awful cliché I'd say they were actually twinkling. His hair is a mess, he's bristly and unshaven, his tee-shirt is on inside out, and he's waving sodden leftover Mexican food under my nose.
"Jack, please," I say, putting down my cup. "I don't--I just don't--" but despite my best efforts, I can't help it, I'm losing the battle. I can feel the smile pulling at my lips, and Jack knows it, the bastard.
He smiles right back at me, happy as can be, and wags the food under my nose again. "You know you want it," he coaxes.
"That's not what I want," I finally tell him. I pluck the taquito from his fingers, toss it back to the plate and grab a handful of his tee-shirt, pulling hard.
The chair creaks alarmingly as he slides onto my lap. He's heavy and solid and his damn bony ass digs into my thighs, but I don't care, because he smells like bed and tastes like a brand new day.
Three thumbs up
because he smells like bed and tastes like a brand new day
Very nice sap :)
Re: Three thumbs up
Date: 2004-08-11 10:48 am (UTC)Re: Three thumbs up
From:Re: Three thumbs up
From:Re: Three thumbs up
From:Re: Three thumbs up
From:no subject
Date: 2004-08-11 10:56 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-11 11:15 am (UTC)Daniel/Dildo = OTP
snort...I crack me up.
(no subject)
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From:no subject
Date: 2004-08-11 11:13 am (UTC)I now have coffee all over my keyboard.
Thank you very much.
What are you doing on Friday?
Wanna get hitched?
I make very good coffee. And I'm excellent in bed.
no subject
Date: 2004-08-11 07:04 pm (UTC)Wait, did you say coffee? And bed? Those are two of my favorite things. I'm on my way.
Thank you, sweetie, I'm glad you enjoyed the goofy ficlets.
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Date: 2004-08-11 11:15 am (UTC)Sweet, hot, sexy, sensual, funny and domestic... is there a better combination out there? I don't think so *re-reads*
no subject
Date: 2004-08-11 07:07 pm (UTC)Thank you so much for the kind words, I'm glad you enjoyed!
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Date: 2004-08-11 11:30 am (UTC)How come even your drabbles and vingettes are little works of art? You rock beyond all rockieness.
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Date: 2004-08-11 07:09 pm (UTC)I'm glad you enjoyed your ficlet. I enjoyed your challenge, that's for sure. *g*
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Date: 2004-08-11 11:50 am (UTC)Fic 1: Perfect Sam. That's what she is like, a lot.
Daniel cleared his throat. "Do you think that maybe we could, uh, start the briefing?" Heh. When I read that I was wondering, when did Daniel become the grown-up on the team. Then I realized that he always was.
Fic 2: Boys with Toys! *loves you* See, this fandom doesn't give the boys toys often enough. They seem to think it is terribly kinky. And I just love boys with toys! I want more!
Daniel doesn't move. He lies motionless; arms flung wide and eyes closed, breathing through his open mouth. There is a generous amount of come smeared on his stomach and his cock is wet and shiny.
That image certainly makes up for the lack of toy fic in SG. *g*
Fic 3:
He squeezes my ass on his way to the fridge, as if it's there just for him to play with.
But it is! It has that big Property of Brigadier General J. O'Neill stamp on it. For reasons I can't explain I love Jack/Daniel breakfast fics. Maybe it is because I love breakfast, I don't know, but I know that J/D morning fics always make me very happy.
Three wonderful little fics, thank you so much for sharing them with all of us!
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Date: 2004-08-12 07:05 am (UTC)Glad you liked these! Thank for the lovely comments!
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Date: 2004-08-11 12:00 pm (UTC)Me and Jack. Jack and me. Peas in a pod, yo.
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Date: 2004-08-12 01:18 pm (UTC)I think there are lots of things Jack has wanted to flush down a toilet...people, too. *g*
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Date: 2004-08-11 12:10 pm (UTC)Well, this was a lovely treat. After I went and had my hair all wacked off *OMGpanic!*, these settled me right down. Daniel and his true love, heh! That one was particularly funny, to me. That struck me just right. *g* But as always, sweet, and funny, and hot, and your Jack and Daniel just make me...happy. :D
no subject
Date: 2004-08-12 01:19 pm (UTC)Thank you, sweetie, glad my ficlets could comfort you post-haircut.
no subject
Date: 2004-08-11 12:54 pm (UTC)"We wish to nap now." Oh man that just about broke me. The mental image alone was so lovely, then throw in the teasing snark... *happy sigh*
What's Sam's revenge gonna be? I think she should make up an entire fake set of reports Jack thinks he has to fill out. She can even get Walter Davis in on it. ;)
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Date: 2004-08-11 01:39 pm (UTC)As long as it's not an EMHO report*...
'course, he'd just have Daniel take care of that one!
(*EMHO report - Early Morning Hard-On report, classic military joke on newbies.)
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Date: 2004-08-11 03:15 pm (UTC)going to get paper towel to clean off my keyboard now.
ps. i also vote yes on happy endings.
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Date: 2004-08-12 06:11 pm (UTC)(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2004-08-11 03:21 pm (UTC)um
that would be ovation, you perv.
; P
Great stories. Makes me wish I'd asked for one *g*
no subject
Date: 2004-08-12 06:18 pm (UTC)Yes, I am a perv, and you know it. *g*
Glad you enjoyed the silliness. Thank you!
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Date: 2004-08-11 03:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-12 06:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-11 03:44 pm (UTC)I loved these so much, I knew I would 8-D cute and so very funny! *g*
He just lies there, dripping Oooo! O.O
awww! and the taquito one, jack all mushed up in the morning, and Daniel all mushed up over Jack, so adorable *-))
<3
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Date: 2004-08-12 06:35 pm (UTC)I'm glad you liked these, sweetie! I'm thinkin' Jack must be as cute as ever in the morning. Rumpled looks good on him. *g*
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Date: 2004-08-11 04:51 pm (UTC)And the dildo wasn't even named. Bonus.
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Date: 2004-08-12 06:37 pm (UTC)I did think about using the "D" word. Just because. *giggles*
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Date: 2004-08-11 04:58 pm (UTC)*lol* That's adorable.
"Did you disconnect the hand piece, and only flush that?"
OMG, Sam! *g*
...And you know, it doesn't have to make me coffee. It can do other things."
"And I can't?"..."Not in your wildest dreams, Jack. It *vibrates*."
*snickers*
I'm just quoting your beautiful dialogue here. You've got their voices down completely --particularly in the first one. Sam is so Sam.
Loved all three! :D
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Date: 2004-08-12 07:11 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2004-08-11 06:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-13 06:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-11 08:37 pm (UTC)Karen
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Date: 2004-08-13 06:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-11 11:05 pm (UTC)Wheeeeeeee!!!!
::spins around and around until I get too dizzy and fall over::
You always knock me for a loop! Slipping in that little twist!
I'd say the middle one was my favorite, but I don't want to seem shallow and slutty. *g*
:throws chocolate truffles at Grrrl::
You can play on my trampoline anytime!
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Date: 2004-08-13 06:47 am (UTC)Oh, I know how shallow and slutty you are! That's why I love you so!
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Date: 2004-08-12 11:58 am (UTC)I was going to start quoting the lines I especially loved but then I realized I was cutting and pasting pretty much the whole damned thing. Things. All three.
Still... We wish to nap now. Hee!
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Date: 2004-08-13 06:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-12 12:46 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2004-08-12 01:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-13 06:54 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-12 05:32 pm (UTC)He laughed; I laughed; just thought I should tell you that.
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Date: 2004-08-12 06:06 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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From:so this is all we have to do
Date: 2004-08-12 07:16 pm (UTC)"Okay, I could be in heaven."
In all seriousness, woman, these were spectacular and THANK YOU!!!!
Re: so this is all we have to do
Date: 2004-08-13 06:56 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-14 01:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-16 06:36 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-14 11:51 pm (UTC)Love how it was a 'real' phone and not a cell phone. A Very Jack thing to do. (And since it was Kinsey on the other end, I'm going to imagine it was the important red phone he flushed.)
I'm also going to imagine that Jack really did flush the phone, and he's kidding about kidding about it. He'd do something like that, and he'd know Sam well enough that she would be like a dog with a bone about him doing such a thing. So, to keep Daniel happy and let him and his slides have their moment of glory in the meeting he's just saying whatever needs to be said to get Ssam off his case and back into "work" mode. He'll even put up with Sam's revenge if it keeps Daniel from yelling at him when they get home for taking over his meeting like that.
Love love love love this. *friends*
Now to go and read the rest......
no subject
Date: 2004-08-16 06:35 am (UTC)